Not-Fun Facts
So you want some facts that aren't fun, huh. Some real gut-punchers? Well, here you go.
- COFFINS: Coffins were invented by criminals to hide the bodies of their victims. It didn't work out very well because they were shaped as bodies.
- PRETZELS: The pretzel design was inspired by a German form of torture where the victim would have their bones broken and their body molded into the iconic pretzel shape. -ouch!-
- CHOCOLATE: Coco beans are being harvested 1000% faster since 2018 and farms are being eliminated due to undiversified crop genetics. By the year 2028, chocolate is predicted to be as rare as gold.
- DEATH: Someday you will die.
- WISHING: The light you see from a star takes many lightyears to reach your eyes. This means if you wish on a star, it more than likely already exploded. So even if wishing on a star did something, it wouldn't.
- LIFE: The older you get the faster life seems to go because we stop having new experiences. We start getting into a routine so we can fulfill our obligations.
- REALIZATION: You will someday lose what matters most to you, or die before that, passing the pain onto someone else.
- HELIUM: The world is predicted to run out of all accessible helium within the year 2025. Helium farms are being researched, but at the moment, it is an un-renewable rescource. No more baloons? What a party pooper.
- INTELLEGENCE: According to the Welvming Rating Test, Generation Alpha scored a 0.3 on average, which warns of a great generational decline in cognitive functioning skills.
- GERD: No cure has been discovered for Gastro Intestinal Reflux Disease (GERD).
- MONKEYS: According to The World Ape Escape Foundation, there are 3 billion apes, gorillas, and chimapzees in some form of captivity.
- ASDF: By the year 2030, all ASDF movies (1-15) will be removed forever from the internet. Accordiong to fan speculation, this will be done to "deitify the movies themselves and bring the fanbase together one last time".
- AGE: We're all getting older in this crazy crazy world.
- TRASH: The island of trash in the Atlantic Ocean has grown so large it can be traversed on by foot without sinking through.
- HOSPITALS: Privately owned hospitals in low income communities are being bought and turned into warehouses throughout the United States.
- DISEASE: There are over 3000 life threatening diseases and over half of them are unknown.
- DANCING: It is illegal to dance in Sudan. Violaters get punished by having their hand amputated by a guillotine.
- WORKING OUT: Some things just don't work out.
- FAMILY GUY: In the hit show Family Guy, Brian Griffen, in Season 12 Episode 6 gets hit by a car and dies.
- NOT-FUN FACTS: These facts are no fun at all.
